Drama!

Yesterday was, how shall I put it, not so great in Primary. Actually, there were only about 15 minutes of bad, but it has stuck with me.

Now that I'm in the Primary presidency, I have to put together a Sharing Time one or two times a month to entertain and teach the kids for one of the hours of church*. I thought this would be no big deal, but the Church basically gives you three sentences about a very vague theme and some pictures and wants you to run with it. Since we have Junior Primary (where the ages range from 3-7) and Senior Primary (right now 10 and 11 year olds), that means I'm taking a pretty vague theme and trying to talk about it for a half hour or so in two completely different ways. The little kids are NO problem. I ask them simple questions and do little games with them and it's good.

However, the older kids are rough. These are the kids that were in Jason's and my class before. I have seen this deterioration in attitude with two of them as they get closer to turning 12 and leaving Primary. I know they feel way too old for Primary. I remember that feeling and I don't blame them. But they just sit there, staring at the floor, motionless and surly no matter how much we try to engage them. And they're dragging down the 10 year-old who used to be little mister volunteer and is really smart. I hate to see him taking on that attitude.

One of the 11 year-olds is extremely bright. He would probably be able to make some cogent points in Elders Quorum with the adult men. When he first showed up in our class he was eager to participate, always raised his hand, always had something to add. However, several months with the kids in our ward and he doesn't care and stares at the floor. I suppose it's cooler to not care.

The 11 year-olds who were there yesterday will be turning 12 in December and will be out of Primary. I think that's better for them because they're so over Primary, and I'm really hoping it improves the all-around mood in Senior Primary.

So yesterday I'm giving my little lesson and I'm asking them questions and trying to get them to participate. They gave me some perfunctory answers once they realized I did, in fact, expect them to speak. Then one of them raised his hand and I called on him. He said, "So don't be offended, but this is really boring."

I just stood there. Then I told him that was a very rude thing to say and turned the time over to the music leader.

I sat down in the back, but could feel the tears coming, so I hurried out of there and into the bathroom. Frankly, I felt like an idiot for getting so upset, but it hurt, especially considering that I had spent hours the day before trying to find things that they might be interested in talking about and looking through materials in every source I could think of.

The thing that just kills me is that the kid who said it is a complete little punk, but has always liked me, and has delighted me with these happy smiles when he gets an answer right, and who I have defended to the skies when other people have written him off. I feel like whatever ground we had gained with him has completely disappeared.

I knew he was right, of course. It is boring. A lot of what happens at church is boring and there are only so many ways to spice things up.

So I felt deflated, but then the Junior Primary came in and the adorable Sunbeams made me smile.

Several of the other ladies in Primary comforted me after church, and the music leader reminded me about the day when the Senior Primary refused to sing. Just refused. What are you supposed to do? She looked so despondent that day that I gave her a big hug afterwards.

One of the ladies talked with the kid and he "apologized" to me. Basically what he said was, I'm sorry I said it was boring, but I only said it because it was boring. Great.

I was telling Jason about it after church and one of our friends said that basically sounds like what having kids is like. Ungrateful punks.

*Hi, non-Mormons. We go to church for 3 hours. It can sometimes be excruciating.