Bad Kitty!

This is Tiny. He belongs to Jason. Or, rather, he's Jason and Brandon's other roommate.

He's the sweetest kitty in the world. Tiny loves everyone and is happy to cuddle with you for an hour, or sleep on your neck if you happen to take a nap in the middle of the day. He purrs and purrs until you think he just might break in two with his ecstasy.

However, Tiny has an eating problem, in that he eats everything in sight. Well, not everything. I suppose there's a piece of broccoli somewhere that he would ignore. But the cat loves all things flour-based and all things with sugar. He has been known to open drawers and chew through various packages to get at his tasty treats. He broke his automatic feeder so that he could get to the food inside. Certain things used to be safe. Like spices, for example. But as Tiny's gluttony increases, his pickiness decreases.

Tiny will do anything to get at your food and has to be locked away if people are going to be eating. The second he gets released, though, he shoots like a bullet out of the room and onto the kitchen counter to see what remnants of the meal he can find. One day Jason picked him up and discovered one of Tiny's arms was soaked. Later on he came upon Tiny with his arm deep in the garbage disposal, fishing out long strands of spaghetti. It was like a kitty treasure hole! And he remembers the treasure hole. Every so often he'll mosey into the kitchen and poke his arm down the garbage disposal to see what he can fish out.

So far I've been able to get him to obey me occasionally. For example, one day I actually ate a piece of bread in front of him. This is unheard of because Tiny loves bread. I told him "No!" sternly several times until he finally sat down right next to me, purring, and glancing at me occasionally with loving, squinty eyes. Suck up. At the end I pulled off a little piece and placed in on the floor for him to eat. Then I praised him to the skies and told him what a good boy he was. Jason said he doesn't like the word "no" and gets mad, but Tiny still seems to love me despite my disciplinarian tendencies.

Jason took the above picture yesterday. That's pancake mix on his face.

It's a good thing he's so darn sweet.

I'm A Toys R Us Kid

Have you ever noticed that there are some people who will never, ever grow up? I don't mean those guys who live in their parents' basement. I'm talking about the people who hold down jobs, maybe hold property, but who are perpetual kids in reality. Always partying, always acting like the college freshman let loose in the dorms who thinks it would be a really good idea to try to drink 50 cans of beer in the space between his last final and getting on the airplane to head home for Christmas. (I think he made it to 42 before passing out. He'd been training for this moment all semester. I'm not sure how he made his flight. I think his roommate might have dragged his butt to the airport and poured him onto the plane).

There's this woman who I am currently working with. She works, and has worked as an actual attorney in law firms, she owns property, she has significant assets. I think she's in her late 40's or early 50's. But every day includes some comment about how drunk she was last weekend, or how drunk she'll get this weekend, or commenting on the hot guy she saw. And I'm not even going to get into the ribald comments. Let's just say she seriously embarrassed me when I told her that I was going to see Jason this weekend after 5 weeks apart.

I guess I just have this vision of how responsible adults act, and I can name a few people who don't fit that mold at all. I have no issue with the partying, it's just the talking about it I guess that seems like sort of a put-on. When we all just started college everyone talked about partying because it was new and interesting. But I kind of see this woman at work as making a bid to seem cool to those of us who are younger. (Although I think we've already determined that I am in no way cool so really, no need to impress me).

Of course I think in Mormon culture we're trained to be hyper-adults and hyper-responsible very early. The type of culture that makes you feel like an old maid at 24 is going to foster a feeling of being grown up at a very young age. Mormons definitely have their share of people who don't want to grow up (and by "grow up" in this context I mean get married and all the inherent responsibilities there), but I feel like a lot of my Mormon peers are so grown up, so responsible, so enveloped in owning homes and having kids.

But then there are those that go overboard. Like I know some women/girls who get married and suddenly take on that demeanor of beleaguered wife, clucking condescendingly at their husband's quirks and becoming a surrogate mother to all of the children in the world because her wisdom is vast now that she's married. I've seen this happen to 19 year-olds.

In particular, Jason and I have discussed the lengthening of the husband's name phenomenon. Say there's a guy named Dave or Steve. He's been Dave or Steve basically since birth and all of his friends call him Dave or Steve. However, throw a wife or fiance into the mix and suddenly she, and she alone, is calling him David or Steven. Never, ever, ever has he been David or Steven, but suddenly this new woman changes his name. I guess it sounds more grown up or something. And those who have known him for years suddenly start thinking, well, gee, maybe I should call him David/Steven...?

I think I myself am in grown up limbo. I am an intrinsically hyper-responsible person, but I think not being married and not having a real job yet puts me in that not grown up yet position. I'm ok with that for now, I suppose, although I better not get some 19 year-old newly smug married acting condescending to me.

The Weird World I Am In

As an English major I realize the above sentence ends in a proposition. I'm ok with it.

I've decided that contract attorneys, career contract attorneys that is, are all a little loopy. I think you'd have to be to decide that staring at a computer and clicking your mouse for 10-14 hours a day equals career fulfillment. I feel lucky that I am now the team leader, despite the fact that everyone keeps giving me sympathetic looks and saying how glad they are it's not them. It gives me multiple reasons per day to get up off my bum and run around a bit, which I find very welcome after a few weeks of 10 hour days, 6 days a week when I WAS just sitting on my bum.

I work with lots of people who are doing a variety of things. Some are in between jobs or fresh out of law school. Some have been out of the field for awhile and are just popping back in to make some cash. Some have clients on the side and are doing this for additional money. A couple are saving money to start their own firms. But then there are those who have decided that since it pays so well, they'd just rather do this.

And thus you get the weirdness.

For example, we've already had one screaming match between 2 of the attorneys. They are now in separate rooms, but it was tense there for a bit. Attorney 1 is very nice, but pretty aggressive and could totally have beat up Attorney 2. While Attorney 1 was yelling and pointing, Attorney 2 was acting like a 10 year-old and egging her on with "Are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you still talking?" Basically the rest of us just kept our eyes glued to our computers and waited for it to end. (And I suppose if it happened now as team leader I'd have to do something about it, but I'm really glad at the time that I didn't have to get in the middle of it).

Then there's the new girl who came in Tuesday with the latest batch of attorneys. Not only does she extol the joys of doing document review basically forever, but she came with a reputation already in place. According to a couple of people who worked with her on a previous project she delights in keeping track of people's breaks and reporting excessive breaks and time away from the computer to the powers that be. On her last job she got yelled at for it by the powers that be because basically it was proof that she wasn't paying attention to her own work. However, a couple of people have seen her taking notes already in her little notebook when they go on their breaks. So a small contingency in my room has started taking notes on the breaks SHE takes. Like yesterday she took an hour phone call that she neglected to write down on the sign-in sheet. According to them, they're only keeping tabs for the future just in case she uses her list.

The funniest thing to me though is how she sort of seems to be sucking up to the powers that be. Like she always makes a point of chatting with the firm attorneys or the staffing agency reps when they come in. She also always talks with me. I find it kind of funny because I just want to tell her, "You realize I have no real power, right?"

Then there are the hyper nit-picky people who have 5 million questions. Sometimes I just want to say, "You know, it's really not that hard. I think you're overthinking things a bit here." But of course I just answer their questions and psyche myself up for several more that day.

Hmm. After writing all of this I've decided that contract attorney work drives you crazy AND turns you into a 12 year-old.

Nummers!

Frrreakshow!

Someone, please, make it stop.

Weight Loss

So I know I have a weight loss blog and all, but I'm excited about this. Since I re-started my working out and healthy eating plan 10 days ago, I've lost 5.4 pounds and 3 inches! Good on me, says I.

I Didn't Even Know They Did That

Did you know that squirrels have the capacity to rip small branches off of trees? I didn't. This morning I watched, transfixed, as a squirrel proceeded to systematically strip all of the smaller branches off of one of the limbs of the tree outside my apartment for his nest. Or her nest. Who makes the nest in the squirrel community?

Anyway, the squirrel would dash out to the branch, gnaw at the base for a bit, and then break off the branch using his wee little hands. Then he'd carry the branch in his mouth back to the crook in the tree where he positioned it just so in the nest. Then he dashed back out on the limb for the next branch.

I'm a little concerned because the crook of the tree where the nest is located is kind of close to the ground. To add to my concern, my roommate said that she saw some little boys in the neighborhood throwing rocks at squirrels last week. She went out on the balcony and did the grown-up "Hey, you kids! Cut that out!" So we've made a pact to try to protect our squirrel's nest. How fun would that be to catch sight of the little baby squirrels?

Promotion-esque

In the words of the staffing agency attorney, "I don't know whether to say 'congratulations' or not."

Yesterday I got called into the firm attorney's office and was asked if I would be willing to be the team leader on this project. They're putting 15 more attorneys on the project on Monday and they need someone to be a liaison/contact person for the contract attorneys. Because I've been reviewing a high number of documents and apparently doing them correctly, they asked me. I like to think it also has to do with my sparkling personality and kind, yet firm, authoritative presence.

I've had mixed reactions among the other contract attorneys. Some of them have said "congratulations," while other have said "good luck" in that wary, I'm glad it's not me tone. The job includes more admin responsibilities and keeping up with the staffing agency with regard to supplies and such. I'm fine with it, especially since I'm getting paid a little bit more now. That's always good. More money to save for my move and unemployment period in Boston!

Today has been crazy. I've reviewed all of 30 documents and it's 1:30 already. Yesterday I did almost 400. Anyone else think it's kind of ironic that they took the person who is doing the most documents and now have me doing admin stuff so I can't code as many documents because I'm busy?

With the new people coming in, we got new tables today and got a new room set up. Then we all had to figure out where we're going to sit so the techie people can set up the computers over the weekend. I also asked everyone what supplies they want and made a list for the agency. I may have even finagled sodas out of the agency, but we'll see. (Btw, this job is kind of ghetto when compared with other contract attorney jobs and there's been a lot of discontentment). The firm just announced that we'll be getting lunch every day from now on, which is great.

Word on the street so far is that I'm doing a good job and I seem approachable. But you know, I've been doing this for all of half a day. Apparently when I went out to get my lunch, several people asked the lady I sit next to what I'm like.

Anyway, it's exciting.

Happy Easter! (A Little Early)

I swiped this from Aimee Roo this year.

Trollage

I am not good with trolls. Either I retreat in a little bit of sadness and wonder why people have to be so darn mean, or I get mad and lash out at them in the most cutting fashion I can think of in 10 seconds. Thankfully, my blog is not widely-read and thus far the majority of people who check in on me on a regular basis are nice. And are usually my friends. So they're nice to me. Er, you're nice to me. Thanks for being nice!

Anyway, I'd have to grow some thick skin if my blog were to ever get popular. I like writing, but I'm glad I'm not good enough to get international recognition. Trolls would descend, or crawl out from under their bridge, or whatever it is they do. Case in point: Dooce. I adore her responses to her trolls.

Vegas, Baby!

So San Francisco Jenn is having a big birthday extravaganza in Vegas in June, wherein she and all of her entourage (including me) will be basically massaged and stuffed with fabulous food and treated like queens. Cha, like I'm going to miss that!

I went looking for plane tickets last night and they're pricier than I thought they would be. I checked Jet Blue, Southwest, Orbitz, and Travelocity. I don't really want to Hotwire or Priceline it because I can't pick the times to come in and I don't think anyone would be happy about leaving the blackjack table at 2 AM to come get me. Although supposedly we have access to limo service so that could be cool...

Anyone have any thoughts on where to find a cheap ticket? Is there a secret Cheapo Vegas Tickets website that I don't know about?

Anonymity

I've been thinking a lot lately about how I wish this blog was a little more anonymous. I've always been up front about who I am to a point, and have posted pictures of me and my friends on here, not really expecting to have very many people reading my thoughts, and definitely never thinking of the dangers of the Google cache. I have had to edit some of my posts and email Google to get the entries removed from the cache because some people haven't liked being quite so searchable. Now that I'm looking for a job, I can understand the need to be more discreet. I sometimes wonder if prospective employers have ever Googled various derivations of my full name or email address and happened upon this site, where they've read about my insecurities, my depression, my weight issues, and other things that make me feel really vulnerable all of a sudden.

Now I find myself wanting to talk about some things, but I can't because I'm not anonymous. Anonymity would be a great mask to hide behind right now in order to get your thoughts and opinions. Sometimes I think about the things that are going on in my life and the decisions I'm making and I wonder what I would tell myself if I were my friend and I asked myself for advice. I have this scary suspicion that I would analyze my friend's situation and tell her she's crazy to be doing what she's doing. I would point out all of the things that are worrisome, while weighing the good things, but probably come out leaning toward the opposite path.

But then I also realize that I have a tendency to overthink. A few weeks ago I made the decision to move to Boston and I felt great. Suddenly, over the past few days I am SCARED TO DEATH. I feel virtually paralyzed by this fear and I know that my fears are affecting others in a negative way as well.

Cherry Blossoms

Sunday morning in DC

Blog Alert!

My friend Katie is my fashion icon. She is hilarious and open and the girl teaches a mean Relief Society lesson. In fact, I remember a particular Sunday when I just wasn't feelin' the whole Church thing, but as I was getting ready to leave, I remembered it was Katie's Sunday to teach. No way was I missing that!

Alas, she has moved back to California so her fabulous Longfellow Park 2nd Ward RS lessons are no more. But now she has a blog! Let's hear it for the internet!

Weirder and Weirder

I'm sorry, am I living in some strange parallel universe of my life?

That firm, the weird one that was so brusque with me a week and a half ago, and that posted the more detailed ad on the job board, they just emailed me again. This email was from the partner and was a touch more professional. And they offered me an interview. Again.

Ooookaaay.

I just wrote back and said thanks, but I'm not looking anymore. Blatant lie, but I am sketched out by them at this point.

Bizarre, yes?