Hitting A Wall

I think I need a day off. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed lately with all there is to do and don't really feel like I've gotten much time off to relax and center myself.

Part of it is my own fault because I set expectations for myself and when I don't fulfill them I feel like I have failed. I don't cut myself a lot of slack.

Part of it is just life pressures that I don't feel like I have any control over at all.

* Work is very busy. This is a good thing, but just as I feel like maybe today might be the day when I finally get a handle on my to-do list, I get 4 or 5 more things added to it. I bring work home pretty much every day, but I either feel burnt out when I get home or there is some other commitment and then it's too late. Trust me, if I start reading a contract at 11 PM, I will be out cold in about 30 seconds. But the to-do list is still there and it's just getting longer.

* I had my annual review at work yesterday. It was fine. Not stellar. Fine. My boss can't say anything marginally critical that I haven't thought five hundred thousand times about myself already. Because I am always my harshest critic. One thing that he's wanted me to do for some time now is get out there in the legal and health care community. Serve with some organization, get to know people, network, become involved. Which I'm willing to do, but, I think, when?

* Church responsibilities. I love being in the Young Women's. But there's always something to do. I want to do so much for the girls, but there are so many needs there that I know the calling has the capacity to suck everything out of me if I let it.

(Also, kind of unfair that all the time I spend with the girls at and outside of church and driving them around and going to activities and chaperoning dances and all of that doesn't count as getting out there in the community. I know they're not networking sources, but I feel like it should count somehow...)

* Could I get a free weekend? It's hard to explain to my extrovert husband, but I actually do enjoy holing up inside the house for an entire day sometimes and doing nothing. I also have an internal conflict because I DO like being social and I don't want to miss out on something fun. In addition to having a social life, we also have a lot of church responsibilities on the weekends (yes, Saturday AND Sunday). Every weekend lately we just go, go go. Always something to do, somewhere to go, someone to see. I've been exhausted on Sunday nights and then the week begins again.

* The house is a wreck. It just is. We manage to surface clean every so often, but we never, ever get down to the mass reorganization and dumping that needs to get done. It's been really wearing on me lately, and I've been nagging Jason about it a lot, because, frankly, a lot of the clutter is his. I know some of it is mine too and I don't want to be a constant nag. I feel mad and then I nag and then I feel sad for nagging. But then I feel mad again at the mess. When I do have time to sit and just be for a moment, I find it really hard to relax because there is ALWAYS something that needs to be done around the house. Not just dishes or dusting or sweeping, though heaven knows, that needs to get done too, but all the other projects that we've been saying we were going to do for 2 years. I find myself getting really infuriated with Jason when I know he stays up late until 3 or 4 in the morning, but doesn't use any of that time to do anything around the house. I know it's not fair because he needs time to decompress too.

* I worry about my parents. I know I don't vocalize it that much to them, or to a lot of people, and that my parents read this so I guess now they're aware of it. Not a day goes by when I don't think about them and wish I somehow had the capacity to fix their lives. I need someone to tell me where the line is. How do I stop feeling guilty about not giving them everything I have because I know if I do, I won't have anything for myself or my husband or our (hopefully) future family?

I'm just exhausted.

Through the Magic of Google Reader Maybe Someone Will Read This

I have committed the cardinal sin of blogging by not updating in ages. Over a month, actually, though it doesn't feel like that long.

In truth, I've been blogging fairly regularly at my other blog, since my focus lately has been on healthy living. As my interest in this area grows into a side hobby, it just makes sense to post more there.

So what has gone on in the last month? Well, we've been busy, but it's just with normal stuff. Work, TV, sleep, occasional dinners out with friends, church callings. Here are a few things:

1. The Young Women had New Beginnings this past Sunday and I think it was a smashing success. New Beginnings is an annual program where the girls give little presentations to tell their families what they have been working on for the past year with regard to their Personal Progress projects. They also each gave a little mini talk about each of the Young Women's values and how the values work in their lives. Some of them are shy and told me they thought they did badly afterward, but I made sure to tell them all they did great. Even our bishop said it was the best one he's seen in the ward. We really have a great group of girls and I have so many hopes for them.
   
   In truth, Young Women's is taking up a large chunk of my "spare" time. But it's fun and I really feel that these girls need us - and each other. A couple of them have become close over the last couple months and it's been great to see that friendship blossom even though they're at different schools.
   
   
2. Brandon and Sarah had a baby and I am an aunt, which the only child in me is delighted about. (Note to parents out there: don't have only 1 kid if you can possibly help it. Despite my parents' great efforts to always be the welcoming home and to have my friends over a lot, it's not the same.)
   
   
3. I'm starting my adventures in gardening again in the next couple of weeks so I'll try to be diligent about posting my results. This year I'm growing tomatoes and either cucumbers or zucchini - I haven't decided which.
   
   
4. We're going to Hawaii in a month! I had grand weight loss goals, but they haven't really come to fruition. Overall, I'm healthier, though, and that's a definite plus.
   
   
5. I am really excited about Spring! I think I say this for every season, but I am always excited about what comes next.
   

That's all I can think of right now. I'll work on making sure this blog is updated regularly. After all, it did get me a husband and I job so I feel some loyalty to it.

HOPE

These kids make me happy:



They're from these schools.

Handwarmers for Haiti

Here's the story. I was planning on selling some handwarmers on Craft Hope's Etsy shop for Haiti. However, instead of opening up for donations again on the 5th, they decided that they were going to finish selling what they have and then figure out a way to open another shop in the future for charity because they were a wee bit overwhelmed by the response (they've raised $30,000!).

But I still want to contribute.

So here's my plan. I will custom make 10 pairs of handwarmers at $20 each (which includes shipping) and will donate the $200 to Doctors Without Borders.

You can choose the color and the cuff style. They fit an average-size woman's hand and are pretty stretchy. If you think you'll need it, I can easily make the circumference a bit bigger .

Here are the models:



You can have the cable cuff:
Or the ribbed cuff:
And can choose from the colors below (all yarns are very soft 100% acrylic):
Dark Sage (model above)
Chocolate (model above)
Antique Rose
Crimson:
Navy Blue (looks lighter in picture, but is pretty dark)
Terracotta
Hunter Green

If you would like to order a pair, email me at frazzled.kelly at gmail. I can accept PayPal. I will do my best to ship your order 7 days after you let me know what you want.

Sewing!

Even though my mom is an excellent seamstress and sewed many of my clothes when I was growing up (as well as a ton of clothes for my dolls), I never learned how to sew. Oh, I can sew on a button or a ripped seam, but I've never used a sewing machine.

On Saturday we had an activity where one of the women in our ward taught us some sewing basics. She is an amazing quilter and I'm hoping to get some help from her with making a quilt from some pieces that my great-grandma and my grandma both worked on before they passed away.

The Young Women were invited as well, and we all had a fun time.


(The little girl is my friend's daughter and she is an absolute doll! And she is learning how to sew at 4 years old thanks to her mom)

(Pictures courtesy of Annie)

Craft Hope Projects

I knit 2 red scarves for the latest Craft Hope project. They are going in care packages from The Orphan Foundation of America.




Now I just have to ship them.

Also, I got sick and missed the window to donate to the Craft Hope store for Haiti on Etsy. However, they are going to open up for donations again on February 5th and my plan is to donate custom-made handwarmers (meaning the buyer can specify the size and color and it will take me a few days to make them and ship them). All proceeds go to Doctors Without Borders. I'll keep you all posted when my item is in the shop.

Question: what do you think is a good price?

Recipe Request: Brussels Sprouts

A couple of months ago I had a divine meal at our favorite French restaurant that included a side of brussels sprouts in a yummy, slightly fruity glaze. Since then, I've been intrigued with finding good brussels sprouts recipes. I don't have any bad childhood memory baggage associated with them, like I know a lot of people do. Plus, I think they're kind of cute. Wee little cabbages.

Last night I tried a recipe for Balsamic Glazed Brussels Sprouts. What could be better, right? Jason and I summed them up with a big, "Meh." They weren't awful, but I don't feel the need to ever make them again.

So does anyone have a good brussels sprouts recipe?

Helping Haiti

One of my new favorite sites is a site called Craft Hope, which tells you about ways you can be crafty and charitable (thanks for telling me about it, Rebecca!). Their most recent project is making red scarves to go into care packages for foster kids who have aged out of the system. I've already completed a quick scarf with some chunky yarn I had on hand, and am almost done with the second.

With the earthquake in Haiti, they came up with a way to help. Craft Hope has an etsy shop where they are selling projects made by their readers. 100% of the proceeds go to Doctors Without Borders. I was told that handwarmers and hats were selling well, so I dug into my overflowing yarn stash and am making a quick set of handwarmers in a trendy green color. I may make another pair in a more neutral color. Hopefully they'll be done by tomorrow and I can send in photos to get them posted in the shop.

Go here for more details.

Request for Ideas and Recipes

In a couple of weeks I'm supposed to give a short cooking demonstration to some of the ladies in our church. It's supposed to be something eminently useful, like "Multiple Ways to Use a Whole Chicken" or some similar staple ingredient. I kind of like the chicken idea, but am open to other suggestions.

I want to show them how to do one simple thing, and then give them several more recipes to take home. Most of the women are fairly simple cooks, and the idea is to keep things as basic as possible.

If I go with a chicken, I have a couple ideas:

- Crock Pot Rotisserie Chicken (emphasizing that you can use the leftover bones to make stock)
- Stewed Chicken (which you can turn into chicken soup/stew, chicken and dumplings, or some other dish using the chicken and storing the resulting stock)

Any other ideas for what to do with a whole chicken? Of course, there's always baking it in the oven, but I've only done that with a whole chicken a couple of times and would like to give them a surefire good way to bake it, if anyone has one.

Any ideas for other staple foods I could present on?

Christmas Knitting

Now that everyone has received their Christmas presents, I can show you all what I've been making for the last few months.

First, my dad's scarf (with Jason as model)
This is garter stitch, so it was simple, but I used small needles so it was fairly time intensive.
I think it turned out really nice, and he loves it.

My mom's roll-brim hat
and handwarmers (both made from organic cotton)
I crocheted my mom's handwarmers first, and was actually pleased with my shaping skills, but, like a lot of crochet, it was really stiff. I knew her arthritic hands would not like that. So I tore them out and knit them instead. They wound up being very soft and stretchy - perfect for her.

I also made handwarmers for my sister-in-law Sarah. My brother-in-law confirmed for me that she is, in fact, one of those girls whose hands are always cold.
I also made a scarf for my mother-in-law, but finished it on the plane so I don't have a picture yet.

Hats for my father-in-law

Brandon (BIL)

Taylor (BIL)

and Marissa (SIL)
Now I'm finally making my handwarmers that I've been planning to make since June or so, being a girl of the cold-handed variety myself.

Cold

Anyone want to take a guess what this is?




Answer coming...





So, all of our windows except one are new and double-paned. The giant window in our dining room, alas, is single-paned. I love that window because it lets in so much light and allows me to grow herbs and (sometimes) tomatoes in the dining room.

However, some wintry mornings, it looks like this:
That's a thin layer of ice coating the INSIDE of the window. I could scrape ice shavings off with my fingernails.

When we open the windows in the Spring and the Summer, they lose their seals with the window panes. Every Winter, Jason pushes all the windows closed on the top and bottom and locks them to keep the majority of the cold air out. Well, the past couple of days have been pretty cold, and we haven't sealed up all the windows yet. According to our thermometer, this morning it was 15 degrees outside...

...and 49 degrees in the living room.*

Yeah, I think it's time to seal those windows.

The good news is, by the time I left for work, the sun beating on the window had melted the ice. Tiny was having a good time chasing the rivulets of water.

*We don't really use the furnace unless we happen to be home for the majority of a very cold weekend. There are multiple reasons. 1) The furnace is extremely inefficient and expensive. 2) If we turn on the furnace when we get home from work, the apartment will JUST be starting to kind of get warmish right as we're going to bed. 3) Even when the furnace is on the heat feels really nice when you stand right in front of the vent, but when you move more than 3 or 4 feet away from a vent, the cold takes over. Space heaters are our friends.

Head

I've discovered that I like knitting hats. Over on Ravelry, I noticed that a bunch of the other hat knitters had these styrofoam heads to model their hats. I thought that was a quite an investment into the hat-making endeavor, and also had no idea where one would get a head. So I've been using roughly head-size balloons to block my hats.

Saturday I discovered that if you need a styrofoam head, you go to Savers, where they have a huge display of heads. For $4 each.

Everyone, meet Bronwyn:
Here she is modeling one of my recent creations:

Providence

Look who I just saw when I went out to grab a sandwich



Ah, Providence.

Shameless

This is a blog post to get an extra entry into this knitting needle giveaway from favecrafts.com. Because, frankly, I need another set of knitting needles, but have a feeling Jason will flip out if I buy more. See, I'm knitting a bag and it's too small for the 32" circulars and too big for the 16" circulars. Right now it's on the 16" ones and it's cramped and tight and no fun to work on at all. Ideally, I need a set of 24" needles (and I can get 15 sets of needles for $20 from my favorite ebay seller, but, as mentioned above, Jason may have a heart attack if I buy more), but I think 29" might work. Also, they come in a travel case. Ooooooo.

Anywho, I'm entering the needle giveaway. Please don't enter so I can win. K thx.

Beware the Nigerian Landlord Scam

Jason emailed me this great apartment posting on Craig's List right in our neighborhood. When I inquired, I received this bizarre email asking a ton of personal questions from someone claiming to be doing humanitarian work in Africa and stating that we could not see the inside of the apartment. But once he received our deposit we would get the keys and lease Fed Exed to us. To which I said, I don't think so.

Then today I read this article.

Just wanted to make everyone aware since they're apparently all over Craig's List.

Amigurumi

My cousin had surgery this past Tuesday and my mom will be having surgery on Wednesday (hopefully. She's been waiting for almost 2 years for this surgery). I crocheted each of them a little amigurumi animal, which I wasn't able to post on here until they both got them because they read the blog.

So here's my cousin Amy's bunny, which she tells me she named "B":
And here's my mom's, well, mouse or Hello Kitty:
The pattern was actually for a Hello Kitty, but the ears turned out more rounded than planned and I thought she looked like a mouse, which was still adorable. But my mom recognized her as Hello Kitty, so I guess she's whatever she looks like to whoever has her.

I made these last weekend and then they sat on our dining table for a couple of days before I mailed them out. Once they were all packaged to go out, Jason said in a sad voice, "Oh, no more bunny and mouse..." I asked him if he wanted me to make us a bunny and mouse and he said maybe. After Christmas presents are done.

Update to Providence's Idiotic Recycling Plan

Yesterday was trash day. A girl in Jason's lab diligently put out her trash with 2 recycling bins per trash can.

Her recycling bins were promptly stolen.

Shocker.

Basket Story

Last night I went to Michael's to try to find some doll eyes for an amigurumi creation. FYI, googly eyes are the extent of Michael's doll eye department. However, they do have a giant bead inventory and I found these flat, round, black beads that work perfectly for eyes.

I've observed that Michael's strategy during the economic downturn has been to put everything in the store on massive sale all the time. Judging by the amount of super cheap yarn that now resides in our guest room, their strategy is working. While I was gazing down the aisles, looking for doll parts, I noticed all the baskets were 40% off, so I thought I would give them a perusal. Then I saw a basket that I have been eying since it first appeared in July or August. It's a large light-colored basket with faux leather handles, 2 stripes of chocolate brown, tan and sage green, and a fabric lining.

Only, it was $27.99. I'm not prepared to pay that for a basket that I don't really need. I was kind of tempted when it was 40% off a couple of months ago, but it still seemed like too much. Last night, it had a clearance price on it of $12.99. I did some quick math and decided that if it was 40% off that $12.99 I would be dumb not to get it.

Well, it wasn't 40% off the clearance price. Instead it was 90% off the original price. I got it for $2.79. Ta-dah!
While I was standing in the aisle, wondering how to justify bringing home a large basket when we are supposed to be in the process of decluttering, I saw this cute little one.
I had noticed this basket in the past too. However, there was no clearance tag and at 40% off $12.99, I could maybe justify it. Maybe. But if the first basket, which I loved, needed a purpose, then this one REALLY needed a purpose.

Then it hit me. I always have yarn projects cluttering up my side of the couch. Maybe I could keep my works in progress in this little basket, like so:
Fabulous!

Also, the little basket was 90% off as well. That's right, $1.29.

As for the big basket, it will now be the new home of my overflowing yarn stash. Justification is a beautiful thing.

Don't Get Cocky

I was all cocky after making a few hats that, hey, this knitting thing isn't really so tough. That'll teach me. I have started and ripped out (or frogged as the knitters say) this one project no less than 5 times. I was working on it on my lunch hour and realized that I'm going to have to rip it out again. For one, even though I made a swatch for the gauge and had it all correct, I tried it on and realized it is way too small for the recipient.

For two, I can't seem to increase via the "M1R" or "M1L" stitches without leaving gaping holes underneath the stitch. According to the folks on Ravelry, the stitch is supposed to twist somehow so that there is no hole. Well, I've watched 4 videos and read explicit directions and I am convinced I'm doing exactly what they say to do and it's still not working. I think I'll have to get one of my knitting gurus to explain it to me at our craft night this week. Good thing that's tomorrow night.

I guess this is what they call the learning process. These are Christmas presents though so I need to have learned this by, say, next week at the latest.

Asininity

[Local rant to follow]

Recently, our fair city of Providence has implemented probably the stupidest trash pick-up policy ever conceived. Their new plan is to only empty your trash if you put out your recycling bins.

OK so far, right?

But here is how they have morphed that simple plan into something that's going to make our city smell pretty bad sometime in the near future.

1) They will only empty your trash if you have two recycling bins (one for paper, one for everything else) per trash can. So that means at houses like ours, where we have two trash cans and two recycling bins, only one trash can has been emptied for the last 2 weeks. Last week they slapped a bumper sticker with "Green-Up Providence" on the trash can they didn't empty. Oookaay... That doesn't really tell us anything. Jason thought maybe they didn't empty it because the lid wasn't on tight enough...? Then I saw a news report about the new policy and everything became clear (one week after the policy was implemented).

2) The city didn't really do anything to tell us about the policy, and the things they did do didn't include all the relevant information. In this article, city employees say they sent mailers and blanketed the community with information. Um, no. We didn't get anything in the mail and as I already mentioned, I only found out about it by watching the news a week after the fact. Plus, none of the materials said two bins per trash can. Yesterday after not taking our trash, they taped a piece of paper to the trash can explaining that in order to get our trash picked up, we needed to put out our recycling bins. Nowhere on the piece of paper did it say two recycling bins per trash can. Mind you, the trash man was standing RIGHT NEXT TO OUR RECYCLING BINS as he taped that piece of paper to our trash can telling us we needed to put out our recycling bins.

3) Recycling bins get stolen ALL THE TIME. We used to have 4. Now we have 2. I'm worried that when we put our 2 out next week someone who doesn't have any will drive by and snag them because you see...

4) The recycling bins cost $5 each. Now the new policy is starting to make sense in our cash-strapped city. According to this article (which seriously missed the overall point), "The Department of Public Works sold 2,000 of the $5 bins on Monday alone and another 1,000 on Friday. By way of comparison, the city sold 5,600 recycling bins in all of October." Hmmmm...

5) The new policy doesn't take into account the numerous leaf bags that people also have sitting on their curbs. I don't know if the mayor noticed, but it's the end of Fall here in New England, and people are raking the leaves out of their yards in preparation for Winter. Last night on my drive home from a meeting, I counted about 30 leaf bags still sitting on the curbs. I know other cities have mulching pick-up for the leaves, and I would solidly support that sort of initiative in Providence, but so far leaves get picked up by the garbage man. Though not anymore, apparently.

6) The new policy also doesn't seem to consider that most houses in Providence have 2-3 families living in them. As the only people currently living in our 3-family home, the two of us never come close to filling up our recycling bins, but I'm sure a full 3-family home could fill them both. That same house would probably generate 5-6 cans of trash, considering some weeks Jason and I can generate enough trash to fill 2 ourselves. So that one house is now supposed to have 10-12 recycling bins in front of it as well?

I am all for recycling. I'm recycling's biggest fan. Jason teases me sometimes because of how diligent I am with rinsing out our plastic and glass containers and making sure the maximum amount of stuff gets recycled. Every week we put out our trash cans and our recycling bins. We're doing it right. Yet, for the past two weeks, one of our trash cans has not been emptied because we don't have 4 recycling bins.

The lack of clear thinking and planning that went into this policy just boggles my mind. Anyone with half a brain could see the flaws, though I suppose they're hoping a few thousand dollars in recycling bin revenue will solve all of their fiscal woes. Maybe there's a reason Rhode Island in general is rapidly declining if these are the sorts of great minds we have working in our government.

As other people have suggested in the comments to articles about this, maybe the best place for our non-emptied trash is on the steps of City Hall.